Saturday, November 17, 2007
The Pyros hit at the top of the ramp all the way down to the ring and on the ring posts as the Big Birthday Bash begins. The crowd are going bonkers all over the arena and there isn't a fan in his seat in this packed 42000 person arena.
((Kyle Bacon is standing at the top of the stage with microphone in hand))
P. Lickin-- Joey, tell me that's a microphone in that kid's hand.
J. Styles-- Uh, yes it is P, what'd you think it was?
P. Lickin-- I don't think I can say on primetime national television.
Kyle Bacon-- Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to introduce to you at this time, a man that I am no stranger to...
P. Lickin-- I KNEW IT!
J. Styles-- Ha ha, I don't think that's what he means by it though.
((The fans are all kinda laughing))
Kyle Bacon-- No, no, no! That's NOT what I meant you sick freaks! What I meant was...
((At that time, "Sugar" by Kid Rock plays over the pa system. Not wasting much time, Jonny Cedrone comes walking through the curtain. He's wearing a gray Armani suit with a black button-up shirt and a maroon/black/gray tie. He takes his shades off his eyes and sets them up on top of his head. He comes out, and stands next to Bacon...but not TOO close. The music fades away and the interview begins))
Jonny "The Studd" Cedrone-- Let me start off by saying that I am NOT the guy he was talking about. Rico's set to come out a little later.
Kyle Bacon-- I...uh...
Cedrone-- And why would you say something as ambiguously gay as that anyway?
Bacon-- I didn't mean it like that though. I can't help it you and all these other people took it that way.
Cedrone-- Look, it won't effect my reputation, everyone knows what a ladies man I am, so let's get on with the interview. I mean it's such a big deal tonight! It's the eighth anniversy of VWF's existence.
Bacon-- So you're not upset that you're not involved in a wrestling match on the card?
Cedrone-- No...wait, what? I'm not in a match tonight? What kind of a special showing would this be without me being in a match? Hasn't management been paying attention to the ratings since the day I joined? Every card I was on, they've had an increase in ratings! Cedrone equals ratings, no questions about it.
Bacon-- Now that you've mentioned it, you've kinda been on a roll since joining the VWF haven't you?
Cedrone-- Bacon, when you've got the looks and money that I've got, you're ALWAYS on a roll with the women. And when you've got the wrestling skills I've got, you're ALWAYS on a roll in the win/loss column.
Bacon-- And that's something that Tazz just learned the other night.
Cedrone-- You know, as modest as I am, I hate to say "I told you so" but, I told you so. I said at the beginning of that night that I was gonna beat Tazz and enter the tournament to declare a new Champion to a new Championship, and I did.
Bacon-- So do you think you'll go all the way?
Cedrone-- All you have to do is ask the girls...if I go all the way, and while you're at it, ask them if they like the climatic end result.
((Cedrone points to the curtains behind him as a clip of "Sugar" plays again over the pa system. Four lovely brunettes come walking out in their glamorous attire and when they reach Cedrone, Jonny looks back at the curtains and waves again. Four beautiful blondes come strutting out in THEIR glamorous attire. Once THEY reach Cedrone, he gets on the mic))
Cedrone-- And that ain't all Bacon.
((He looks up the curtain again and four gorgeous red heads come strutting out. They're all at the top of the stage standing around Jonny. Jonny gets a huge grin on his face and wraps his arms around two of the ladies there. The music stops))
Bacon-- You seem happy.
Cedrone-- Well wouldn't YOU be if you had all this at your disposal. Count 'em Bacon...12 beautiful women...twelve of them, and there's even more waiting back in my hotel room, but they couldn't come out on the stage because they weren't wearing TV approriate clothing.
Bacon-- What were they wearing.
Cedrone-- That's the problem, they weren't wearing anything.
Bacon-- Sounds like a wild party.
Cedrone-- Man, when you've got the looks that I do, you have the ladies eating out of the palm of your hand. And when you've got the money that I have, it makes it that much easier.
Bacon-- No wonder some of the guys are expressing their jealousy in the back
Cedrone-- Let them be jealous, they deserve to be jealous. I can't help it that I have what it takes to get it done in the bedroom AND I have what it takes to get it done in the ring as well. I'm a very blessed man, what can I say? I'm just better than those guys.
Bacon-- So you think you're well on your way to the top of the VWF?
Cedrone-- I don't THINK, I KNOW! I'm on a roll, I'm participating in the tournament to crown a new Champion at The End. And that's exactly what it's gonna be...The End...The End of everyone's dreams of being put into the Hall of Fame as the first Champion of whatever Championship is being made, because it's coming home with me.
Bacon-- I think that pretty much covers everything Mr. Cedrone.
Cedrone-- Can't you feel the excitement in the air Bacon? It's like nothing I've seen or felt before. The fans are excited, the guys and ladies in the back are excited, it's like...I don't know what it's like, but it's a good feeling. It's a cause for celebration, as we all know, it doesn't take much for me to call for a celebration, so let's go Bacon. Let's go have a party.
Bacon-- Gee, I don't know.
Cedrone-- You don't know? Come on man, I've got at least twelve beautiful women waiting to party, and plenty more where they came from. How about you helping me out. Take some off my hands for the evening and paint Chi-Town red with me tonight!
((A couple red heads, couple blondes, and couple brunettes walked over to Bacon and pretty much start groping him))
P. Lickin-- I'll help ya Jonny! Anybody's gotta be better than Joey's mom. No offense to your mom Joey, but sometimes a man just needs a break.
Cedrone-- What do ya say Bacon? Just look at the girls, you can't disappoint them now can ya?
Bacon-- Well...
Cedrone-- Come on man, if they fire you for going out on the town with us, I'll make sure you're taken care of financially. I'll create a job for you at my casino, I don't know I'll think of something...Oh wait! I can pimp you out! I heard that some dudes are kinda freaky like that.
((Bacon shoots him a disgusted look))
Cedrone-- Alright, alright, a little too far, but if you end up fired, I'll think of something for ya. I won't let you go without a job. Who knows, maybe I can talk management into letting you back in because you know that as I go along, I'll only get more and more pull around here. So come on Bacon, there's a club just down the street that's just waiting on me to show up. Let's go.
((Bacon just stands there for a second, then the girls that came over and leached onto him started to pull on his arms, then one went around to his backside and pinched his butt, which got him going. "Sugar" hits the pa system again as Jonny and his entourage head to the back))
P. Lickin-- He's leaving me here...with you!
J. Styles-- You can't win 'em all!
P. Lickin-- Evidently HE can!
J. Styles-- Are you jealous?
P. Lickin-- I guess your mom'll just have to due for tonight.
JOEY STYLES: Why are you so mean?
P. LICKIN: I'm not mean, cause I make the scream. When they come over, I make them cream. You look at me, I'm not what I seem. But look in my eye, and you see that gleam.
JOEY STYLES: What gleam?
P. LICKIN: The gleam of a happy man.
JOEY STYLES: Why are you happy?
P. LICKIN: Because it is our 8th Birthday Bash, and I'm STILL EMPLOYED!
The Vikingtron flickers to life as the camera shot that begins at the feet of Stacy H pans up past her long shapely legs. Continuing upwards, she has a short denim skirt that only just fits so that if she bends over to get into the ring she’ll be giving her fans a nice view of her panties. Panning up once more, it shows a pink bra, just visible under her white shirt. The cameraman pans up to Stacy’s face and she smiles as he zooms out to reveal The Rick sat on a bench in the locker room as Stacy finishes tying up her shoelaces and reaches out in front of her to show her husband the lingerie she intends to wear for tonight’s contest.
The Rick – Mamacita!
Stacy H – You like?
The Rick – Oh hell yeah! It’s just a shame that when you go out there wearing that the host is going to be the one person that’s more interested in your clothes than you!
Stacy H – Rico’s ok really. Well, at least he doesn’t try to hit on my like Kyle Bacon!
His ears burning, Kyle Bacon walks into the room.
The Rick – Kyle Bacon, Órale, vato loco!
Kyle Bacon – I take it you’re ready for tonight’s Eddie Guerrero tribute match then, Rick?
The Rick – Ready? Kyle, it was an honour just to be asked to compete in this match and tonight me and the cisco KID are going to tear the house down for one very special member of the audience looking down from above!
Kyle seems to ignore The Rick's comment, and focuses his attention on Stacy H.
Kyle Bacon – Damn Stacy, you’re looking good tonight!
The Rick grabs Kyle Bacon by his scrawny little neck and throws him out of the room.
The Rick – I tried to be civil with him this time you can’t say I didn’t try!
Stacy H - …
Before Stacy can say anything, there is a knock at the door and Rico enters.
Rico – Stacy, my my you are looking ravishing tonight it’s going to be a tough competition out there later on… Rick, still upset that it was I, Rico, who defeated you for the VWF Championship I see?
The Rick – That was a fluke…
Rico – Keep telling yourself that! I can see from the way you are dressed it still pains you to admit defeat I mean look at what you’re wearing… It’s good, I like the tribute to Eddie on the t-shirt but you need to glam it up a notch. I have just the thing, wait right there!
The Rick – It’s my locker room, I’m not going anywhere!
Rico disappears for a brief moment, returning with a glittering pink feather boa which he promptly wraps around The Rick’s neck.
Rico – Ah much better, and now for the coup de grâce!
Rico grabs a pair of giant shades with a pink frame and puts them on The Rick’s face.
Rico – See Rick? Rick and Rico together as a tag team.. Doesn’t it sound fabulous?
The Rick takes off the glasses and places them in Rico’s hand he then takes off the feather boa and hands that back to Rico as well.
The Rick – No it doesn’t! Look Rico, if you don’t mind I just want to get mentally prepared for my match tonight. Go ask Tazz if he needs a tag team partner I’m sure he’d be really ‘choked’ up to have a former VWF Champion offer to become his ally!
Rico – Sounds like a plan. Good luck tonight, to both of you!
Stacy H – I see you remained calm there.
The Rick – Yes, I’m remaining focused on tonight first and then getting the World Title back at The End!
There is another knock at the door.
The Rick – Holy Jim Hellwig!
Stacy opens the door, Ron Simmons is shown lying on the floor peering up her skirt.
Ron Simmons – Damn!
Stacy stamps on Ron with her sneaker and then closes the door on the top of his head.
The Rick – Who was that, honey?
Stacy H – No matter, let’s just not open that door again until I have to go out for the contest ok?
The Rick – And what are we going to do until then?
Stacy H – Oh I think we can think of something.
Stacy goes over to her husband and sits on his lap. They begin kissing but The Rick stops.
Stacy H – What’s wrong?
The Rick – Sorry honey but we’re going to have to open the door again!
Stacy H – Why’s that?
The Rick – The cameraman is still in here!
The Rick opens the door and the camerman leaves, walking backwards and keeping the door to the locker room in shot.
The Rick – Sorry buddy, I know it’s the VWF’s Birthday and a lot of people want to see my wife in her birthday suit but you’re just going to have to wait a little longer…
The door closes and the cameraman zooms in on the door, beneath the names of The Rick and Stacy H there is a message that reads:
“Happy Birthday VWF, here’s to another 8 years!”
The cameraman turns off his camera and walks away as a message fades onto the screen:
“Eddie Guerrero: 1967 – 2005. Rest In Peace… Viva la raza!”
Pinfall or Submission Only Match,
( Eddie Guerrero Memorial Trophy )
(-(-(
As Cisco Kid arrives at Ringside climbs the turnbuckle and salutes the crowd, then comes down and waits in the corner to begin the match. Rick taunts him. Cisco Kid pulls himself to his feet by the top rope and turns to stretch his arms, warming up. Rick comes running to splash him from behind, but Cisco Kid moves out of the way in time. Rick hits the corner, stumbles out and is greeted by several punches - the 4th sends him to the mat. Rick recovers, gets up, and is greeted with a clothesline that sends him over the top rope. Cisco Kid climbs out to follow him. He picks Rick up and throws him onto a few empty chairs. He asks the fans to get up and then whips Rick across the seats. Cisco Kid grabs Rick by the hair and bringing him back to the ring. Rick gives him a punch to the gut, Cisco responds with a forearm to his back and then sends him surfing through another section of seats. He picks Rick up and whips him into the plastic barricade. Cisco whips Rick into the metal rail and then takes a drink from a near by fan and throws it at Rick, drenching him, he then pulls him to his feet and they head back towards the ring. Rick manages a few punches at his chest, but CK hammers him around the back of the head before throwing him into the metal steps.
JOEY STYLES: Come on, get back in the ring!!
P. LICKIN: But you can hurt your opponent better on the outside Styles!!
Grabbing Rick by the hair, Cisco kid throws him back in the ring and quickly locks in a BOSTON CRAB.
JOEY STYLES: And after almost ten minutes of action we have our first submission attempt.
The referee checks on The Rick, but he refuses to quit, instead he reaches out and grabs hold of the bottom rope. The official forces Cisco Kid to break the hold. Cisco Kid picks Rick up and shoots him into the ropes, following with a running knee to the midsection. Cisco Kid tries to shoot Rick again, but Rick counters and shoots Cisco Kid into the ropes instead. Rick follows with a big clothesline that takes both men over the ropes to the outside.
JOEY STYLES: Oh so in the ring will you!!
P. LICKIN: You like saying that word don’t you…ring!!
JOEY STYLES: You’re sick, you know that.
P. LICKIN: But you haven’t denied it.
Rick and Cisco Kid both get to their feet, and exchange blows. Rick kicks Cisco Kid to the midsection and hits a DDT, then grabs a chair. Rick tosses the chair in the ring, then rolls Cisco Kid in the ring right after it. Rick picks Cisco Kid up and hits a scoop slam on Cisco Kid onto the chair, then goes to the ropes. Rick hits a running elbow drop to the back of Cisco Kid’s neck. Rick picks Cisco Kid up. Rick chops Cisco Kid to the chest and shoots him into the turnbuckle. Rick chops Cisco Kid in the chest again, and the crowd gives a "Woo!" Rick chops Cisco Kid a third time, getting another "Woo!" from the crowd. Cisco Kid hits a big forearm to Rick's head and tosses him in the turnbuckle. Cisco Kid hits an overhand chop to Rick's chest, getting a "Woo!" of his own.
JOEY STYLES: Cisco Kid taking it right back to the former VWF Champion...
Cisco Kid grabs Rick and hits a headlock takedown, then hits a soccer kick to Rick's back. Cisco Kid takes a moment and goes to the turnbuckle. Rick gets to his feet, holding his back. Cisco Kid jumps off the turnbuckle, hitting a missile drop kick to Rick's back, knocking him face-first into the mat. Cisco Kid goes to work stomping on Rick's back. Cisco Kid rolls Rick over and drops his elbow down on the small of Rick’s back. Picking his opponent up Cisco Kid shoots Rick into the turnbuckle and hits a running splash. Cisco Kid grabs Rick and locks in a headlock. Cisco Kid goes for a bulldog, but Rick hooks the leg and counters with a backdrop suplex. Rick and Cisco Kid both get up a little slow, and Cisco Kid comes at Rick. Rick hits an arm-drag takedown, then wrenches the arm, cinching in a FUJIWARA ARM BAR. Rick leans back wrenching Cisco Kid’s further. The official checks on Cisco Kid, but he refuses to surrender.
JOEY STYLES: It’s clear that neither man wants to lose this match.
P. LICKIN: That may be the dumbest thing that I’ve ever heard you say.
Realising that his opponent isn’t ready to quit, Rick yanks Cisco Kid to his feet by his arm, and hits a roundhouse kick to Cisco Kid's head. Rick hits an elbow drop to Cisco Kid’s shoulder. Rick picks Cisco Kid up and shoots him into the ropes. Rick hits a back-body drop, and then goes to the turnbuckle. Rick ascends the turnbuckle as the crowd goes wild. Cisco Kid gets to his feet. Rick goes for a moonsault, but Cisco Kid is able to jump up, hitting a dropkick to Rick’s back. Both men are down, one holding his shoulder, the other his back.
JOEY STYLES: Cisco Kid might have broken The Rick’s back with that dropkick!!
Cisco Kid stirs first, and picks up Rick. Rick breaks the hold, kicks Cisco Kid to the midsection, and hits the RICKFEST on Cisco Kid! The crowd goes crazy as Rick signals for the end. Locking his opponents arm between his legs, Rick wrenches back on Cisco Kid’s head in a CRIPPLER CROSSFACE!!
JOEY STYLES: This could be the end for Cisco Kid!!
P. LICKIN: Great, that means we can move on to the boobies!!!
Crying out in defiance Cisco Kid stretches out and manages to grab hold of the bottom rope.
P. LICKIN: Oh come on!! I wanna see boobies!!
Releasing the hold, Rick picks Cisco Kid up and shoots him into the turnbuckle, Rick hits a back elbow smash to Cisco Kid, but Cisco Kid is able to low blow Rick. Both men go down to their knees. Rick and Cisco Kid both slowly get to their feet, and exchange blows. Rick blocks a punch, and kicks Cisco Kid to the midsection. Rick grabs Cisco Kid and hits a vicious DDT. Again Rick goes to the top rope and leaps of going for a senton bomb. Cisco rolls out of the way as Rick lands hard on his back. Cisco Kid laughs and begins to stop on Ricks injured back before picking him up and shooting Rick into the ropes, hitting a clothesline on the rebound. Slowly, Rick gets to his feet, but Cisco Kid takes a running leap and drives a forearm into the lower back of his opponent.
JOEY STYLES: The Rick’s back has got to be killing him.
P. LICKIN: Well why doesn’t it do it quicker then, I WANNA SEE BOOBIES!!!
Cisco Kid picks Rick up and after a few more shot to his back, he throws him towards the ropes. Cisco Kid goes for a back body drop but Rick flips over the top, picks Cisco Kid up and goes for a running power slam. At the last moment, Cisco Kid slides off Rick’s back, grabs hold of his head and locks in a DRAGON SLEEPER on the way down.
JOEY STYLES: Wow what a reversal.
P. LICKIN: BOOBIES!!!
Rick stretches out and hooks a foot over the bottom rope but before the official can break the hold, Cisco Kid drags Rick into the centre of the ring. Stepping over his opponent, Cisco Kid sits down turning the hold into a DRAGON CLUTCH. The Rick howls out in agony.
JOEY STYLES: This could be the end.
P. LICKIN: No you moron, that’s next month…BOOBIES!!!
The referee checks on The Rick, he refuses to quit. Smelling blood, Cisco Kid wrenches back contorting his opponents back even more out of shape.
JOEY STYLES: Come on ref, that’s now more of a choke hold then a submission attempt.
The Rick is fading fast, but he struggles, and is able to get a book on the bottom rope. The ref makes Cisco break the hold. The Rick chokes and holds his neck, gasping for air as Cisco and the ref argue. Cisco comes back over and starts to lay in the boots on The Rick. Cisco picks The Rick up and hits some punches as he puts him in the corner. Cisco hits a chop to the chest, drawing a "Woo!" from the crowd. Cisco shoots The Rick to the opposite turnbuckle, then charges in. The Rick gets a boot up, catching Cisco in the head. Cisco staggers back, and The Rick comes out and hits a bulldog. The Rick picks Cisco up, but Cisco sweeps out The Rick's legs and hits a legdrop, then locks in the Figure-Four Leg Lock! The Rick screams out in pain as Cisco continues to wrench it in. The ref checks on The Rick, who still is holding on. Slowly, The Rick starts to roll Cisco over while still in the Figure-Four, reversing the move! Now Cisco screams out in pain as The Rick flexs his leg muscles to wrench it in. Cisco holds out. The ref checks... Cisco Kid taps out! The bell rings!)-)-)
P. LICKIN: The Rick wins! The Rick wins! What a match!
JOEY STYLES: Isn't that my line?
P. LICKIN: Oh. Sorry. I was reading the script wrong.
JOEY STYLES: It's ok...
P. LICKIN: Either way, the next match is what I'M waiting for!
JOEY STYLES: The Lingerie Contest IS up next!
P. LICKIN: Seriously. This is better than banging your mom.
Lingerie Contest - Special Host: Rico,
( None )
(-(-(
All of the ladies are in the ring, and Rico is walking up and down as each of the girls is standing in the ring. Rico walks up and down the line of women as he looks at them all standing in their robes. Rico is talking on the mic...
RICO: No No No! None of this will do! You are not fabulous enough! Those colors... those styles. You all would be better off just naked!
(Kylie Marie grabs the mic away from Rico...)
KYLIE MARIE: Rico. This is low. Even for YOU. I am a BEAUTIFUL woman. I am not some random slut that you and all the other pigs out there can oogle for your enjoyment. I am NOT showing you my lingerie. I am NOT showing you my body. You get to see what I want you to see when I want to. Not when YOU want to. So THERE!
(With that, Kylie Marie goes to leave. However, Cheyenne is in her way. Kylie shoves Cheyenne out of her way, but Cheyenne shoves her back. Kylie slaps Cheyenne in the face, then leaves the ring. Cheyenne runs after Kylie and tackles her, and the two women fight as VWF Officials come out to break it up...)
RICO: Oh no! My contest! Hurry... distract the crowd... show them your heaving busoms!
)-)-)
P. LICKIN: ....
JOEY STYLES: You ok?
P. LICKIN: My headset shortet out.
JOEY STYLES: Why?
P. LICKIN: I drooled all over it.
JOEY STYLES: Well then...
P. LICKIN: Hey! What's going on here?
Out of nowhere, "Land of Confusion" plays through the arena, and the crowd begins booing as "Double A" Axton Anderson comes down to the ring, microphone in hand, dressed in his non-competition clothing. As he walks up the ring steps and entough the ropes, the music fades out and Axton begins to speak.
AA: Greetings to all of my fans in Chi-Town!
The crowd's boo's become even louder.
AA: Now I know the question that's plaguing your minds right now...
JOEY STYLES: I think that question is, what is he doing out here, interrupting our event?
P LICKIN: No, we're all wondering where he gets his stylish wardrobe!
AA: ... and it's running through my mind as well. Why wasn't I booked on the card tonight? Clearly, the boys in the back could've found a suitable match for me tonight. The World Heavyweight belt isn't being defended tonight, why not? Why not have a special presentation of the belt to myself at the very end of the show? We can just bypass all the waiting and GIVE the belt to me!
The crowd stays with its consistent booing.
JOEY STYLES: And this is coming from a guy who's only won one match so far, and even took cheap shots on another completely irrelevant match!
P LICKIN: He's got a point, Joey, just skip all the waiting and give him the World Heavyweight title!
AA: That's right, just go ahead and award the belt, or at least some belt. Damnit, it's completely wrong for the VWF to hold me back like this. I don't care what's in the rules, I deserve way better, if I'm going to become the new icon of the VWF. Moreso than that, I'm destined to be VWF's Greatest Hit!
JOEY STYLES: More like the VWF's Greatest Sh- (cut off)
P LICKIN: Woah, calm down, Joey!
AA: However, while I do understand that we can't live in a perfect world, I know I'm not going to be treated with the respect that I deserve. In everyone's eyes, I'm still a rookie, and nothing's going to change that for some time. That's why I've decided, at least for the time being, to bring in some support. After a quick scouting of the VWF, I've decided to call in a partner to help me dominate and shine withing the VWF.
By now, Axton has his back to the stage while talking to the crowd. With that, Benjamin "Mr. President" Martel runs down to the ring with a steel chair and, with Axton not even realizing he's there, smashes the chair upon Axton's back to take him down, much to the crowd's delight. Tossing the chair outside of the ring, Martel grabs the microphone off the mat.
BM: Axton, for the past week, you've been nothing but a royal pain in my side. You're so arrogant, you've screwed up other people's matches, well I'm sick of it! I want you in a street fight, right here tonight!
The crowd cheers even loudlier, but suddenly, a bald man with a t-shirt and denim shorts runs down to the ring, and slides in. Now with Benjamin's back to the stage, thus not realizing who's behind him, the man clobbers Martle across the back with his forearm. Next, he grabs Martel and throws him out of the ring, over the ropes, and assists Axton back to his feet. With Martel taking a few steps backwards up the stage, Axton grabs the microphone again and gives Benjamin his challenge.
AA: Ben, I've had enough of you! You want your street fight, you've got it! But it won't be against me, it'll be against my new partner here, "The Machine" Travis Green!
Travis Green raises his fists high in the air as "Land of Confusion" begins playing. While pointing to the two in the ring, Benjamin Martel yells inaudibly at them both, as he heads back up the stage. Axton and Travis pose together, introducing themselves as a new tag team in VWF. Travis drops to one knee, extending his arms and fists crucifix style, while Axton stands behind him with his arms raised up, open-handed. Once Benjamin leaves the arena, both men slide out of the ring and also head out of the arena, exiting through the crowd.
Middleweight Battle Royal ,
( Middleweight Medal of Valor )
(-(-(
Aggression's music blares over the PA system. Aggression walks out and down the ramp and aisle. Aggression walks up the stairs and walks over the rope entering the ring as the fans give Aggression a mixed reaction. "Californication" by Red Hot Chili Peppers blares over the PA system as Chris Ponger runs out, ready to start. Chris Ponger slides into the ring. Chris Ponger gets up and Aggression knocks him down with a clothesline. DING DING DING! Chris Ponger gets up and goes for a cross body attack but Aggression captures him and hits a huge fall-away slam. Chris Ponger goes rolling under the ropes to the outside. Aggression gets up and goes through the second rope, then gets on the top turnbuckle waiting for for Chris Ponger to get up. Chris Ponger gets up and Aggression flies off hitting a huge flying clothesling nearly ripping Chris Ponger's head off to a big pop from the crowd!)
JOEY STYLES: Aggression nearly ripped Chris Ponger' head off!
P. LICKIN: Damn that must of sucked.
(Aggression picks up Chris Ponger and whips him hard into the guardrail. Aggression charges towards Chris Ponger and Chris Ponger goes to back body toss Aggression over the guardrail but Aggression lands on the other side of the guardrail right on his feet. Chris Ponger jumps on the guardrail and goes for a front flip attack but Aggression counters hitting Chris Ponger with the SICKEST POWERBOMB ON THE CEMENT!!! The fans let out a big "Ouch!" as Chris Ponger lands.)
JOEY STYLES: Oh my god! That was about the sickest bump in VWF history.
P. LICKIN: That was the cruelest thing I have ever seen.
(Aggression picks up Chris Ponger and hits a snake eyes on the guardrail. Chris Ponger bounces back and Aggression kicks Chris Ponger in the midsection and hits a suplex over the guardrail onto the protective floor. Aggression steps back waiting for Chris Ponger. Chris Ponger gets up and Aggression charges jumping over the guardrail hitting Chris Ponger with a flying elbow smash. Aggression picks up Chris Ponger and rolls him into the ring. Aggression slides in and waits for Chris Ponger to get up. Chris Ponger gets up and Aggression goes for the big boot but Chris Ponger ducks and kicks Aggression in the midsection and hits a huge DDT!)
JOEY STYLES: Chris Ponger hit the Johnny Aggression with a HUGE DDT!
P. LICKIN: We can read.
(Both men are down when "I Know It's Gonna Hurt" by Prick hits the PA system. Phoenix appears from backstage, and slowly meanders his way down the ramp...
Joey Styles: Phoenix...
P. LICKIN: He's such a big pussy, I mistook him backstage for your mom's snatch.
Phoenix stands in the ring, looking over his two opponents as the bell rings for the start of the match. Immediately Chris Ponger and Aggression lock up, going back and forth, neither able to overpower the other. Finally Chris Ponger gets some momentum and swerves Aggression into the corner. He lays into him with a few rights, before laying a kick to the mid section on the VWF newcomer. Phoenix takes advantage of the situation, hitting Chris Ponger from behind with an axe handle to the back. He pulls Chris Ponger out from the corner, and hip tosses him across the ring. Chris Ponger runs back, and receives another hip toss for his trouble. Chris Ponger runs again, but stops...Phoenix looks slightly surprised, but then turns just in time to receive a clothesline from Aggression. Aggression and Chris Ponger beat down Phoenix, stomping on him in the middle of the ring. Fusin turns and raises his arms to the fans, as does Chris Ponger, but the two turn and make eye contact, and start exchanging rights and lefts. Chris Ponger is backed into a corner this time, and Aggression locks his shoulders down against the ropes. He climbs the ropes, and starts laying in right fists...the fans counting to every punch he connects with...1...2...3...4...5...6..Phoenix interupts it with a right fist to Aggression's back. Aggression slumps over Chris Ponger on the turnbuckle, and Chris Ponger manages to grip his arms under Aggression's legs, coming off with a powerbomb into the ring. Chris Ponger goes for the cover..1...2...Phoenix breaks it up. Chris Ponger gets up and into Phoenix's face. The two exchange words, before exchanging pushes. They are about to lay into each other, when they both look down and continue to beat down Aggression. Chris Ponger picks up Aggression and hits a suplex across the ring, while Phoenix comes off with an elbow drop to the mid section. Chris Ponger grabs Phoenix from behind though, and connects with a reverse DDT. He goes for the cover...1...2...kickout. He covers Aggression...1...2..kickout. Chris Ponger looks distressed, as he walks over to Aggression and stomps on him. He then goes over to Phoenix and drops an elbow. Chris Ponger climbs the turnbuckle and gloats to the fans. Phoenix rolls out of the ring, and Aggression tries to prop himself up on the ropes. Aggression is up, and runs at Chris Ponger, who ducks and connects with a neckbreaker. Phoenix starts to get up,and Chris Ponger goes over and starts to bully him. Phoenix cowers in teh corner. Aggression scrambles to his feet and lays out Chris Ponger with a clothesline. Phoenix stands back up, and Aggression goes after him. He locks the head, and applies pressure using the ropes. The referee kicks Aggression's leg off the ropes, but Aggression puts it back on again. The referee breaks the hold, and Aggression argues with him, allowing Phoenix to capitalize. Phoenix hits a dropkick to Aggression's back, followed by a leg drop to Aggression's throat. He bends over, stalking Aggression, as he slowly raises to his feet. Phoenix hits a kick to the mid section, followed by the LEAVE ME ALONE ON JOHNNY AGGRESSION in the center of the ring. Phoenix gloats to the fans, but is given little respite, as Chris Ponger attacks him from behind, sending Phoenix to his knees. Chris Ponger comes off the ropes with a vicious knee to Phoenix's face, sending him to the mat. He rolls Phoenix to the center of the ring and goes up top. Chris Ponger jumps off, and hits a frog splash. "Romper Culo" by Polaco hits, and out comes Halo with a good pop from the crowd...
JOEY STYLES: Halo has had a bit of a stumble in his career lately, but a good outing tonight good turn that around quick...
Halo slides in the ring as Chris Ponger gets to his feet. Halo charges, and Chris Ponger eats a clothesline. Halo back up. Chris Ponger also gets to his feet. Halo clotheslines him down again. Halo celebrates as the crowd cheers. Halo goes to climb the turnbuckle, but Johnny Aggression is back up, and charges Halo, shoving him off the top to the outside Halo is eliminated "I'm so Hood!" by DJ Khaled ft Trick Daddy hits, and out runs Bobby Jackson. However, before he can get to the bottom of the ramp, Tazz pops out of the crowd and waffles Jackson with a steel chair right in the face. Jackson is down as Tazz laughs, and rolls in the ring. Phoenix is up and takes one look at Tazz, then passes out. Tazz begins to laugh as Chris Ponger hits Tazz from behind with a double ax-handle. Tazz staggers. Chris Ponger hits him again in the back, and Tazz staggers into the corner. Chris Ponger starts to lay into Tazz with rights and lefts. "Structural Defect" By Static-X hits, and Gamer Nerd comes stomping down the ramp. VWF Officials are helping Bobby Jackson up as he shakes off the hits from Tazz. Gamer Nerd walks up the stairs, climbs the turnbuckle as Aggression gets to his feet, and jumps off hitting the MISSLE COMMAND ON JOHNNY AGGRESSION! Gamer Nerd takes the Cabo Wabo Middleweight Champion off his feet as the crowd erupts. Gamer Nerd picks Aggression up and shoots him to the corner, as he lays into him with punches. Phoenix starts to wake up. Tazz is being hit with punches by Chris Ponger, but grabs him by the waist and pulls Chris Ponger into the corner head first. Tazz starts to hit some stomps to the back, sending Chris Ponger to his knees. Bobby Jackson is up as VWF Officials want him to return to the back, but he shoves them off, whipes the blood off of his cheek, and goes down the ramp as the crowd starts to cheer. Tazz hits a backdrop suplex on Chris Ponger as Bobby Jackson rolls in the ring. Gamer Nerd hits a monkey flip on Aggression, sending him into the middle of the ring. Tazz stands up, gloating when Jackson charges, hitting a clothesline on Tazz. Tazz gets right back up, and Jackson clotheslines him down again. Tazz is up again, and Jackson shoots him to the ropes. Jackson hits a tornado DDT on Tazz, then picks him up and shoots him to the corner. Jackson runs at Tazz, and hits a climb up kick to the face. Tazz staggers down the side of the ring, and Jackson immediately gets back up and hits a drop kick, sending Tazz over the top rope to the apron. Chris Ponger runs at Tazz, hitting a spinning heel kick on him, sending him to the floor. TAZZ IS ELIMINATED. Jackson is running on adreneline as Chris Ponger is up. Jackson hits a drop kick on Ponger. Then hits a drop kick on Gamer Nerd. Then hits a drop kick on Aggression. Rico's theme hits, and he skips down the ramp, throwing kisses at the crowd. Gamer Nerd is up and hits a few punches on Jackson, then hits an inverted DDT. Rico slides in the ring. Gamer Nerd back up and hits the GAME OVER ON RICO! Rico falls right back over the top rope to the outside. RICO IS ELIMINATED Darth Doozer comes walking down the ramp. "Thriller" By Michael Jackson hits, and out comes Zombie Shovelman right behind him.
JOEY STYLES: Man... somebody in the back really wants to liven up this match. It looks like the remaining competitors are coming out!
P. LICKIN: I thought Rico already came out...
"Crazy Train" by Ozzy Osbourne hits, and Rodney Edision comes out, standing at the top of the ramp. He waits for a moment as everyone gets in the ring. Darth Doozer and Zombie Shovelman attack Gamer Nerd with punches, and have him on the ropes, trying to push him over. Aggression and Ponger have started to exchange blows again. Jackson is up, and helps out Ponger with Aggression. Rodney Edison starts to come down the ramp, taking his time. Jackson and Ponger have Aggression up in the corner, trying to dump him over the top rope. Phoenix is up, looks around timidly, and grabs Jackson's leg, dumping him over the top rope to the outside. Bobby Jackson is eliminated. Rodney Edison is on the apron and gets in the ring. Phoenix is jumping up and down celebrating. Doozer and Zombie Shovelman are able to get Gamer Nerd over the top rope, but he lands on the apron. Gamer Nerd hits an elbow on Doozer, then an elbow on Zombie Shovelman. Gamer Nerd hits a shoulderblock on Zombie Shovelman, then hits a springboard sunset flip. Gamer Nerd is back up. Darth Doozer stares at Gamer Nerd and puts out his hand, then yells out "You cannot stop the force!" Gamer Nerd smiles and hits the GAMER OVER ON DARTH DOOZER! Darth Doozer falls backwards right over the top rope to the outside. Darth Doozer is eliminated
P. LICKIN: Gamer Nerd must be a Star Trek fan...
Phoenix is still jumping up and down celebrating his eliminating Jackson. He jumps on Edison, giving him a big hug. Edison stands for a moment, then hits a belly-to-belly suplex on Phoenix right over the top rope to the outside. Phoenix is eliminated Ponger has Aggression down in the corner, choking him out with a knee. Zombie Shovelman is up. Ponger motions for him to hit a splash on Aggression. Zombie Shovelman charges in, but Ponger doesn't move, instead putting the shoulder down and dumping Zombie Shovelman over the top corner, sailing to the floor below. Zombie Shovelman is eliminated Zombie Shovelman stands up, grabs a cat a fan is holding in the front row and bites it's head off, then returns to the back.
P. LICKIN: Who brings a cat to a wrestling event?
JOEY STYLES: Who cares. We are down to our final four!
The crowd cheers as Aggression grabs Ponger from behind. Aggression hits a facebuster. Gamer Nerd tries to get Aggression as he gets up, but Aggression his a back elbow, and Edison grabs Gamer Nerd, hitting a German suplex. Aggression and Edison pick Ponger up and hit a double team suplex. Aggression and Edison pick Gamer Nerd up and hit a double team toss over the top rope, but Gamer Nerd skins the cat. Both men turn their backs and Edison hits a leg drop. Aggression hits a standing senton on Ponger. Gamer Nerd goes to the ropes, and hits a springboard Missle Command on Rodney Edison! Aggression goes for a superkick, but Gamer Nerd catches the foot, spins Aggression around, kicks him to the midsection, and hits a facebuster. Gamer Nerd back up, but this time Edison is right there. He kicks Gamer Nerd to the midsection and shoots him to the ropes. Rodney Edison leapfrogs over, and goes for the hip toss as Gamer Nerd comes back, but Gamer Nerd lands on his feet. Gamer Nerd goes for a spinning heal kick, but Rodney Edison ducks, knees Gamer Nerd to the midsection and hits THE END OF DAYS ON GAMER NERD! Rodney Edison take a second, and stands up as Gamer Nerd lays in the ring. Aggression comes over and grabs Gamer Nerd, but Edison shoves him away. Aggression shoves Edison, and Edison and Aggression exchange blows. Edison gets a kick to the midsection, and goes for the End of Days, but Aggression counters with a back body drop. Aggression turns around, but Chris Ponger is back up, and attacks Aggression with a huge lariat. Edison is back up. Ponger and Edison shoot Aggression to the corner, then Edison runs and hits a big splash. Ponger runs in and hits an avalanche. Edison and Ponger take turns stomping on the Cabo Wabo champ, then pick him up. Gamer Nerd is back up, and his a reverse DDT on Ponger from behind. Edison tosses Aggression over the top rope, but he lands on the apron. Rodney Edison goes over to grab Aggression, but Aggression hits an elbow, then hits a hangman on the ropes. Edison staggers back, and Gamer Nerd hits the GAME OVER ON RODNEY EDISON! Edison staggers back, and Aggression pulls down the rope rope so Rodney Edison falls over to the outside. Rodney Edison is eliminated. Aggression rolls back in the ring. Ponger grabs Gamer Nerd from behind and shoots him to the corner. Ponger hits a wheelbarrel kick on Gamer Nerd, then sets him up top. Ponger climbs up and looks to go for a superplex, but Gamer Nerd blocks it. Gamer Nerd shoves Ponger off, who falls out into the middle of the ring with a thud. Aggression capitolizes, and runs up, hitting a climb up kick to Gamer Nerd's head. Aggression climbs up top, and goes for a hurcanarana, but Gamer Nerd counters and hits a powerbomb on Aggression! The arena is on their feet as all three men are down...
JOEY STYLES: OH MY GOD!
P. LICKIN: Alright... that was a sweet move. I'll admit it.
Ponger is the first to stir, as he gets up. Ponger goes over to Aggression, picking him up by the hair. Ponger picks Aggression up, but Aggression breaks the hold, hits a couple of elbows, and shoots Ponger to the ropes. Aggression runs after Ponger, but Ponger floats over the top rope to the apron and pulls down the top rope. Aggression falls over and to the outside Johnny Aggression is eliminated. Chris Ponger stands up on the apron, but Gamer Nerd comes out of NOWHERE and hits the GAME OVER ON CHRIS PONGER! Chris Ponger falls to the outside. The ref calls for the bell!
)-)-)
ORDER OF ENTRY
ORDER OF ELIMINATION / ELIMINATOR
Johnny Aggression (c)
Chris Ponger
Phoenix
Halo
Bobby Jackson
Tazz
Gamer Nerd
Rico
Darth Doozer
Zombie Shovelman
Rodney Edison
Halo / Aggresion
Tazz / Ponger
Rico / Gamer Nerd
Bobby Jackson / Phoenix
Doozer / Gamer Nerd
Phoenix / Rodney Edison
Shovelman / Ponger
Edison / Aggression
Aggression / Ponger
Ponger / Gamer Nerd
(((Kyle Bacon is back stage with a mic waiting outside the door to Feelgood's locker room.)))
Kyle Bacon- I am outside the door to Dr.Feelgood's locker room.
Camera Man- The narrator already said that.
Kyle Bacon- That bastard.
Narrator- Okay Bacon. Back to the pink font for you.
Kyle Bacon- Damn! Please can I have the white back again?
Narrator- No.
Kyle Bacon- Double Damn! Where's Ron Simmons when I need him?
(((The door opens and Feelgood and Jekyl walk out to stand on either side of Kyle.)))
Kyle Bacon- Gentlemen! May I get a word with you about tonight's match and your feud with the VWF President and Owner Viking King?
Dr.Jekyl- Nice pink font you got there, Kyle.
(((Kyle's shoulders slump as he dejectedly holds the mic up to Feelgood's face.)))
Dr.Feelgood- Crimson and I are at a Crossroads here in the VWF. Tonight we must decide if this vendetta is over, or if it's just begun. Tonight we will determine Viking King's next steps. I already know the answers to these questions. So does Crimson.
Crimson, you and I both have a job to do here. Despite what has gone on between us and Viking King, we find ourselves in an all too familiar position in this match. But we both know that our first job here in the VWF is to wrestle and give our best night in and night out. I expect nothing less from you. Just know that when it comes to Viking King and his mob or Scott Carr, I've got your back. May the best man win.
Kyle Bacon- There you have it folks. Feelgood making a statement that should speak volumes to the rest of the Viking Wrestling Federation.
(((As he finishes speaking, Jekyl holds up a handfull of SPAM and shoves it in Kyle Bacon's open mouth. Kyle's eyes fly wide with terror as Jekyl picks him up by the front of his shirt.)))
Dr.Jekyl- I hear you've been talking about my belly button again, Bacon. How many times do I have to do this before you get the message?
(((With that, Jekyl drops him into a DDT and gets up, leaving Bacon sprawled on the floor.)))
Dr.Jekyl- What a waste of SPAM.
The lights in the arena suddenly flicker red and the sounds of "Paint It, Black" begin to fill the arena as the crowd goes nuts.
Joey Styles: Hey P, you know whose music that is?
P. Lickin: Oh man, it's that bible thumpin' jerk Reverend Crazy! Just what the hell is HE doing here?
Joey Styles: It is the Birthday Bash, so as a former VWF World Champion, he's more than welcome!
John Crazy makes his way down the ramp and grabs a microphone. The crowd is still buzzing over his surprise return. He enters the ring and the crowd dies down to listen to what he has to say.
Reverend John Crazy: Well looky here, seems like the old VWF Arena is still here, every brick, every seat, even the marks are still hanging out in the receiving dock. But it disappoints me to see that some things are the same, namely the morality in the VWF is at an all time low.
Reverend Crazy shoots a glare over in P. Lickin's direction.
P. Lickin: Whats he looking at me for?
Joey Styles: Ask your conscience...
Reverend John Crazy: I look at some of the people on this roster, some where here when I was and some are new faces to me, but I've heard of most of you. Let me just say this, if ever a company needed some moral fiber, this is it! Crimson, good to see your still "hitting the music for the fat chicks" and I see Cisco and Vox are still doing their thing, and I see someone even dug up poor old Shovelman and have desecrated his memory by having him join the ranks of the undead! I thought I would come back to the VWF and find talented wrestlers, but all I see is a flood of perversion! I...
Suddenly, "Think About The End" begins to play and none other than the Viking King comes out to interrupt the "holy man."
Viking King: You want to come out here and talk down on His roster and His company's lack of morality? While alot of what you say is true, you don't have to point it out to everyone! Since you're here though, He's gone ahead and booked you in an impromptu match!
Impromptu Match,
( None)
(-(-(
Suddenly, Tazz comes running from behind the curtain and barrels down to the ring at full speed. He slides under the ropes and gets right in the Rev's face.
Tazz: You know I'm going to choke... you...
Before he can finish his trademark catchphrase, the Reverend slap the taste out of his mouth. Tazz's face turns red with anger and he tackles the ol' devil dodger and starts the ground and pound. After beating into the Rev for a few moments he finally lets and and grabs the Rev by the hair, pulling him to his feet.
Joey Styles: Didn't take much for the Reverend to piss off Tazz.
Tazz then locks in a rear naked choke, but the Reverend gets his foot on the bottom rope. After the referee finally convinces Tazz to let up on the hold, he stands up and stalks the Reverend, waiting for him to rise to his feet. When he does, Tazz charges at him. However, Rev sees Tazz coming and steps aside, leaving Tazz to crash into the turnbuckle. He shakes it off and turns around, and Reverend Crazy surprises him with a dropkick!
Joey Styles: A nice dropkick from the Rev, and he stays on the offensive by driving Tazz's knee into the canvas.
P. Lickin: Now he's locking him in the Figure Four! Fight out of it Tazz! Take out this bum!
Tazz turns the Figure Four over and Reverend breaks the hold. Both men get back on their feet and the Reverend attempts an uppercut, but Tazz reverses it into a hammerlock, then taking Crazy down with the Tazzplex! He hooks the Reverend's leg for the cover but only gets a two count. Frustrated, Tazz grabs the Reverend's head and beats it into the canvas. After a couple of pounds, the Reverend throws Tazz off of him.
P. Lickin: Oh man, Tazz has him right where he wants him!
Joey Styles: You might be right, Tazz is picking him back up and he locking in the Tazzmission!
Tazz attempts to lock in his signature move, but Crazy kicks Tazz in the crotch out of desperation. Tazz is holding himself as the Rev grabs him and whips him into the ropes. As Tazz is coming back, the Reverend kicks him in the gut and sets him up...
Joey Styles: Here it comes, the Insider's Edge!
Reverend Crazy hooks Tazz's leg and goes for the pin. .1..2...3!
Joey Styles: In his first VWF match in almost a year, Reverend Crazy comes out with a victory over Tazz!
P. Lickin: He got lucky...
As the referee raises Rev's hand, Tazz rises to his feet and boy, does he look pissed! He bumrushes the Rev and locks in Tazzmission tight!
P. Lickin: Thats right! Bring the guy down a notch!
Joey Styles: Crazy's turning blue!
Security finally pries Tazz off and they escort Reverend Crazy out of the arena.
)-)-)
JOEY STYLES: Reverend John Crazy comes out, makes an appearance and takes out Tazz!
P. LICKIN: So... is he back?
JOEY STYLES: I'm not sure P. I noticed his name was taken off of Injured Reserve last night.
P. LICKIN: Crap. He doesn't like sinners...
Backstage we find Kyle Bacon along with the members of "Team 5150"
BACON:"Hello again,everyone!I'm standing here with 'The Premier Player' Ace Montana,Cassidy & Well 'n Dowd,the members of 'Team 5150'.Did you just stop by to give a birthday message to the VWF?
WELL:"Wow,it's the VWF's birthday,too?I didn't know I shared the same birthday as the VWF."
BACON:"Well the,Happy Birthday,Brian."
Dowd:"It's not his birthday.We told him we were coming tonight and he just got it in his head it was his birthday."
WELL:"And just think,I wanted to go to Chuck E. Cheeses for my birthday.Is there gonna be cake?"
BACON:"I'm not really sure,Brian."
CASSIDY:"I wouldn't count on it.We all know how cheap the catering around here usually is."
ACE:"That hasn't stopped your ass from getting any bigger."
CASSIDY:"I can't believe you just said that to me."
ACE:"I can't believe you haven't noticed."
WELL:"So,you're telling me there is no cake?What a jip!I'm missing my cartoons for this.'Fairly Odd Parents' is on right now.I like Cosmo,he's stupid."
DOWD:"From the mouth of babes."
BACON:"Anyways,what brings you guys out tonight?You're not on the card,I'd of thought you might enjoy the night off."
ACE:"You really want to know why we came tonight.Crimson Lightning vs. Dr. Feelgood.I kind of have an interest in the match.As you know,I've made it clear that I want to use my 'Money In The Bank' contract to go after the I.C. title at THE END."
BACON:"So,which one are you hoping wins tonight?"
ACE:"Doesn't really matter,Bacon.The point is I want to have an up close and personal view of that match.But,If I had to pick one,it would be Crimson.I've never had a match with the man before and I know what it could do for my career to beat a man who has been here from the beginning.With that said,we need to go find our seats.Let's go guys."
BACON:"There you have it.Ace plans on keeping a close eye on the Intercontinental Championship.Back to you Joey and P."
House Rules Match ,
( Intercontinental Championship )
(-(-(
Dr. Feelgood opens the wooden door to the two story house. He peers through the darkness. Crimson turns a light on, holding the Intercontinental Title while sitting on a rocking chair. They give each other a nod. Feelgood then charges Crimson, tackling him as both flip over the rocking chair. Feelgood ends up on top. He starts to pound away at Crimson’s head. Crimson rolls his hips and mounts Feelgood as he connects with right and left hands. He stands up and allows Feelgood to get up. He charges Crimson. He picks him by the hips and drives him into the kitchen. Both men crash into counter. They continue to beat the hell out each with fists while rolling around on the floor. Crimson grabs Feelgood and slams his head into a cabinet. He then leaves the area. Feelgood shakes off the blow and goes searching for Crimson. He walks upstairs to find Crimson at the top. Crimson tosses a plastic trash can at Feelgood’s head. Feelgood moves out of the way and charges the top. Crimson delivers a front kick and sends Feelgood tumbling down the steps to the bottom. Crimson disappears again. Feelgood regains his composure and goes upstairs. He turns a corner only to get with a wire clothes hanger. Crimson delivers several shots to the body and head. He drops the hanger and tosses Feelgood through a wooden door. Feelgood crashes through, knocking the door of its hinges. Crimson makes a pin. 1..2.. Feelgood kicks out. Crimson rummages through the closest and finds a keyboard. He attempts a swing at Feelgood, but he ducks and clobbers Crimson in the head with a forearm. He picks up the keyboard and shatters it over the head of Crimson. He makes a quick cover. 1..2.. Crimson is able to kick out. Feelgood picks Crimson up by the hair and throws him back into the hallway. Feelgood grabs a painting off the wall and slams it over Crimson’s head. Crimson staggers. Feelgood kicks the border of the painting and Crimson tumbles to the ground. Feelgood opens the hall closest and starts throwing rolls of toilet paper at Crimson. Crimson is able to get the painting off as Feelgood throws him into another room. Feelgood looks around on the desk and finds a stapler. He staples Crimson’s hand a few times as he screams out in pain. To shut him up, he smacks him in the back of the head with a package of copy paper. Feelgood drags Crimson by the hair and takes him back downstairs, but Crimson fights back and the two hammer away at each other with right hands and that sends both men down the stairs and crashing hard. Crimson is the first to get up and walks into the kitchen. Feelgood staggers up and follows Crimson. Crimson whacks Feelgood in the head with a cutting board. Crimson opens the fridge and takes a banana. He sees Feelgood getting up and throws a frozen turkey at him that connects to the midsection. Feelgood drops to his knees. Crimson walks over with an ice cube tray and slams it over his head, sending ice everywhere. Crimson makes a pin. 1..2.. Feelgood kicks out. Crimson picks up Feelgood and attempts to whip him into the fridge, but Feelgood reverses it and Crimson crashes into the fridge, making ice cubes come out of the ice maker. Feelgood uses the counter as leverage to stomp away at Crimson. He reaches down and starts to choke Crimson. The referee cannot stop it. Crimson begins to fade, but delivers a snap kick to the groin to release the hold. Crimson holds his neck in pain. He kicks Feelgood in the gut and throws him into the bathroom. He picks up Feelgood and rams his head through the glass shower wall, shattering everywhere and cutting Feelgood wide open. Crimson looks at the toilet and smirks. He opens the lid and stuffs Feelgood’s head in it, giving him a swirly. Blood pours from his head. Crimson drags him through the house and into the basement. He rams Feelgood’s bloody head into the steel pole supporting the ceiling. Feelgood falls to the ground helplessly. He makes a cover. 1..2.. Crimson picks up Feelgood, not being done with him yet. He slams him into the washer and then slams him on top of the dryer. He tosses a basket of dirty clothes on Feelgood and walks back upstairs. A few minutes later, Feelgood, who is covered in blood, staggers back upstairs. He picks up a frying pan from the kitchen and searches for Crimson. He wanders down the hallway and finds Crimson, who was hiding. Crimson pops out, and gets nailed with frying pan to the face. Feelgood falls on top of Crimson. 1..2.. Crimson kicks out, but he is also bleeding from the forehead. The two man catch their breath and then proceed to beat the hell out of each other. Crimson throws hard left haymakers that stagger Feelgood. He returns with right crosses that drop Crimson to one knee. Feelgood attempts a soccer kick to the face and lands it perfectly on the chin, cutting that open as well. Blood is everywhere as Feelgood regains his vertical base and stomps all over Crimson. Feelgood picks him up and they battle each other until they are back in the kitchen. Feelgood grabs a rolling pin, but Crimson is ready and connects with a second low blow. Crimson picks up the rolling pin and cracks it over Feelgood’s skull. He covers. 1..2.. Feelgood gets the shoulder up. Crimson is frustrated. He looks to the fridge. He pushes it from the wall and slams it down on Feelgood’s midsection. Crimson hops on top of the fridge and tells the referee to count. 1..2..3..
)-)-)
(We see DBR exiting Viking Kings Office. DBR turns and looks back in at him.)
DBR-Yeah... I appreciate that... I'll go talk to her, you get in touch with him... this is all going to work out nicely.
P. LICKIN: What was that all about?
JOEY STYLES: I'm not sure...
P. LICKIN: Well... wait. It looks like The Viking King is making an announcement backstage...
(The Vikingtron shows The Viking King sitting in His office, behind His desk. He has two velvet clothes sitting on His desk, covering something...)
VIKING: Timing. Timing is everything. And in this day and age, if you miss the correct time, you will LOSE everything. So now is the time to change the industry. There are many championships out there in The VWF. But each of those represent something. And it's high time that we represent MORE of the world. While we have an Intercontinental Champion to represent the American continents, it is high time we had a Eurocontinental Champion to represent the European and Asian continents. and as the United States and Britannia Heavyweight Titles are representative of two of the more important regions in our business, we also have the Cabo Wabo Middleweight Championship to represent those high fliers from south of the border. But to represent our talent and fans from the Pacific region, we should also have a title indicitive of the high flying style from THAT region as well. So without further adu, I give you the Pan-Pacific Championship, and the Eurocontinental Championship:
VIKING: Now. You are all wondering. How is it that these championships will be held? Well... in the tournament that we have already began qualifications for, that will be to crown the NEW Eurocontinental Champion. ALL wrestlers are able to qualify for this championship, of which if all goes well, should be awarded at The End next month. And to reward the final four men in the EXCELLENT Middleweight Battle Royal tonight. Johnny Aggression, Gamer Nerd, Chris Ponger and Rodney Edison will face off on next week's Thanksgiving special of VWF Crucifiction to crown the NEW Pan-Pacific Champion. Also, the Women's Championship will no longer be regularly defended, as it will now be defended every few months as time permits. That is all. Good luck to all involved.
Brazilian Death Match ,
( Brazilian Death Match Sceptar )
(-(-(
Joey Styles – Well folks, it’s time for the main event of the evening and the return of the brutal Brazilian Death Match! The ring will be encased by a steel cage, raised twenty feet into the air and then as an added factor we’re going to set the damn cage on fire as well!
P. Lickin – Toasty!
Joey Styles – Indeed! Now, there are a couple of doors that will be locked shut around the cage the aim is to break those doors open, send your opponent out of the door and to the floor below.
P. Lickin – Or if you’re really brave, or just plain insane you can try and throw them over the cage, but if you even think about trying that, you’re gonna get burned!
Joey Styles - This is not some stunt match with minimal risk, these men are putting their entire careers and lives on the line for this one. Last year, Crimson Lightening was the King of the Brazilian Death Match and won the Death Match Sceptre. Tonight, five superstars will look to take that honour for one entire year! Let’s get to it!
["Haunting Me" By Stabbing Westward plays throughout the arena as the VWF World Heavyweight Champion, Creed makes his way from backstage and towards the ring. The champion looks down the aisle at the ring surrounded by the cage structure and slowly makes his way down the aisle towards the ringside area. One of the two cage doors is open as Creed steps inside and sees how much give there is to the cage as he awaits the arrival of his opponents.]
Joey Styles – Remember the VWF World Heavyweight Championship is not on the line in this match, but don’t for a second think that’s going to stop Creed from trying to win this thing. This is one match that has just as much prestige as the VWF Title, there are bragging rights on offer here and I’m sure Creed would love those rights to be his!
["The Way You Like It" By Adema plays and the crowd is on it’s feet as “All That” Lee Ryan makes his way down towards the ring. Ryan dead eyes Creed all the way down towards the ring as the champion waits in one of the far corners from where his rival will enter the ring. “All That” steps into the ring and makes a motion for the World Title.]
Joey Styles – Of course “All That” will have a chance to take that World Heavyweight Title from Creed at The End Pay-Per-View, in a triple threat match between those two gentlemen in the ring and The Rick who we saw earlier in the night in that incredible Eddie Guerrero Tribute Match. But that was then, this is now and this is the main event and these two gentlemen in the ring must wait for their remaining opponents before this match can begin.
["Suffa" by (Hed) p.e. means that “Da Big Rig” Scott Carr is on his way to the ring. DBR has the look of intensity in his eyes that shows he is one hundred percent focussed on this match. He heads through the door to the cage and immediately begins trash talking his two opponents. DBR climbs the turnbuckles and flips the bird to the hostile crowd before turning back to face two of his four opponents in this match.]
Joey Styles – DBR Scott Carr is the wild card in this match, there is no telling what he will do in this one!
P. Lickin – I’d get the emergency servies on standby, Joey! DBR looks like he’s ready to put somebody in the hospital!
[The arena goes black as "Numb" by Linking Park throbs through the jam packed arena. The lights flicker as Michael enters the view of the screaming audience to a green lazer light show. He walks slowy down to the ring and makes his way through the cage door. Bunda removes the hood to his robe and points to Creed who begins arguing with the former VWF Champion.]
Joey Styles – Michael Bunda wants that VWF Championship back around his waist, but right now he has to wait until after The End.
P. Lickin – I don’t think Bunda intends on waiting that long, if he can take Creed out of action for a while following this match then he could have a quicker route to the gold!
[The lights dim as "Stockholme Syndrome" by blink 182 blasts over the PA and Pyros go off at each side of the ramp at the top. The lights come on at the same time as the pyros go off and Vox walks out from backstage. Vox walks straight down the ramp and gets into the ring through the middle and top rope after climbing the stairs and going through the cage door. Vox stands on the bottom turnbuckle at one corner of the ring and raises his arms for the crowd. Then gets down and goes to the opposite corner to do it again.]
Joey Styles – The Vox is in the ring and we are set to go.
[The referee in the ring gives the signal and officials at ringside lock up the doors to the cage. The ring is raised up into the air twenty feet high as the cage is set on fire and the bell rings to signal the start of the match. DBR quickly goes after The Vox as Michael Bunda and “All That” Lee Ryan target Creed. The Vox and DBR head to a corner as The Vox grabs hold of DBR and hurls him towards the cage. DBR’s shirt catches on fire but he rips it off and stamps on it to put out the flames. DBR doesn’t seem to have taken any damage but Vox tries throwing him towards the cage again. DBR again seems to be immune to the pain from the alight cage. The Vox charges in but DBR moves and hurls Vox into the cage. The Vox hits the canvas as DBR begins to feel the effect from hitting the cage twice. On the other side of the ring, Michael Bunda and “All That” are double teaming Creed, trying to wear him down so he can be eliminated early. “All That” hits a DDT and signals that he wants to try to eliminate his nemesis but Bunda attacks him and tries to throw him through the door of the cage. Lee Ryan puts on the brakes and slams Bunda’s head into the cage. Bunda quickly reciols from the cage and tries to put the pain out of his mind as he and Lee Ryan lock up. DBR is back on his feet now and hits Bunda from behind with a double axehandle. Scott Carr grabs Bunda and hurls him towards one of the cage doors. The lock breaks and the door swings open but Bunda does not go through it. DBR grabs him again and looks to get the first elimination of the match as The Vox takes him down with a spinning brainbuster known as That's Gotta Hurt!]
Joey Styles – All five men still in this right now, but I don’t think it’s going to be long until our first elimination!
P. Lickin – Rightly so, Joey. The quicker you eliminate three guys, the more energy you have when those flames are extinguished and we go to a one fall to a finish finale!
[Creed sees Bunda is a little bit weary from tasting the steel and being burned from the cage. The VWF World Champion grabs Michael Bunda and looks to go for the Soul Reaver but Bunda escapes and hits the Darkness Falls flip piledriver. As Bunda regains his balance, “All That” Lee Ryan leaps off the turnbuckles and hits the Leap of Faith on Creed. The Vox then locks in his version of the Sharpshooter known as “Scream Bitch!” on the VWF Champion. DBR is back in the match now, and takes out “All That” Lee Ryan with a vicious clothesline. DBR grabs hold of The Vox and throws him into the corner then picks up the VWF Champion before taking him back down to the canvas with his version of the Burning Hammer known as the Carrearender. Bunda tries to take DBR out with a sneaky attempt at a Cobra Clutch but DBR backs into the cage and holds Bunda against the scorching hot fire. DBR then hurls Bunda out of the cage, twenty feet to the floor below!]
Joey Styles – Michael Bunda has been eliminated from this match!
P. Lickin – I don’t think DBR is done yet!
[DBR has a look of aggression in his eyes as he focuses on his next victim. The Vox squares up to DBR, sending him staggering with a series of punches. DBR is almost sent into the fire and steel of the cage but he manages to shove Vox away, however he isn’t quick enough to get out of the way of Creed who charges in with a spear but has also sacrificed himself as he and DBR both smash into the cage and are burned by the flames. “All That” and The Vox square off now, with Lee Ryan gaining an advantage. “All That” sends Vox into the ropes but Vox reverses and ducks his head for a back body drop, but he telegraphed it and Lee Ryan takes The Vox to the mat with the Double Impact! “All That” looks over to see Creed slowly trying to get back to his feet and heads over. “All That” Lee Ryan picks up the VWF Champion and throws him towards the open door. Creed goes through the ropes, but hangs on and pulls himself back into the ring despite being burned from the alight cage. “All That” looks to put Creed out of the match again, but as he goes over, DBR attacks him with a clubbing overhand punch. DBR and Creed double team Lee Ryan and hurl him into the cage. As The Vox tries to help Lee Ryan to they can keep the heel/face divide even, he is sent down to the mat by a Soul Reaver. Creed then grabs Lee Ryan and throws him towards the door. DBR goes after The Vox as Creed lifts up Lee Ryan and tries to powerbomb him over the ropes and through the door to the cage but “All That” hits a Hurrancarana and both he and Creed go through the door out of the ring taking the huge fall to the floor. The fans start up a “Holy Shit” chant as DBR and The Vox are left as the final two competitors.
Joey Styles – OH MY GOD! Both “All That” Lee Ryan and the VWF World Champion, Creed just took the huge fall and both of them are lifeless on the floor. Get the medical crew out here ASAP!
P. Lickin – Wait.... Lee Ryan isn't on the floor.
Joey Styles - You're right. Where is he? He fell out of the cage door!
The fire to the cage is doused and the flames begin to die out as The Vox and DBR lick their wounds and prepare to fight it out for the final part of this match. DBR plays the power game and lifts The Vox up onto his shoulders, DBR charges as the cage and hurls Vox off his shoulders into the cage. DBR picks up Vox again and once more hurls him into the steel. Vox staggers around as DBR grabs him by the throat and lifts him up for the Carr Bomb. DBR sends The Vox’s back crashing into his knee but doesn’t go for the cover. DBR looks over at the open door and decides a pinfall isn’t enough.]
Joey Styles – That’s not in the rules, you’ve got to pin him not throw him from the cage!
P. Lickin – Well you go up there and tell him then because I’m not going to!
[DBR picks up The Vox’s broken down body and sets him up in the corner. Scott Carr charges in for a spear but Vox moves out of the way and fires away with a flurry of punches which staggers the big man. DBR walks straight into The Vox Drop and Vox goes for the cover. …1…2… DBR kicks out with authority. Scott Carr is getting back to his feet but Vox tries to choke him out and DBR staggers around the ring towards the locked door of the cage. DBR forces Vox into the door but he does not break the choke hold. DBR steps forward and charges back again but Vox still has the hold locked in tightly. One more attempt by DBR and the door flies off, falling to the floor below. The momentum carries both DBR and The Vox through as well, and DBR falls from the ring the full twenty foot drop to the floor.]
Joey Styles – DBR has just taken the twenty foot drop!
P. Lickin – But where is The Vox?
[The cameras switch back to the scene in the ring. The Vox managed to drop down and wrap his legs around the ropes as DBR tried to force him through the cage door. The ring begins to lower as The Vox waits for the bell to signal the end of the match but he realises that it cannot end until there is a pinfall. As the ring returns to it’s original position on the floor of the arena, Vox steps out through the hole in the cage and picks up the lifeless body of DBR Scott Carr. Vox rolls him into the ring and yells out “Happy F**king Birthday VWF!” then covers DBR. 1...2... KICKOUT! KICKOUT! Somehow, someway, Scott Carr reaches deep down and kicks OUT! The Vox can't believe it. But then... Lee Ryan comes out from under the ring! He has a chair in hand as he crawls out, bleeding from the head...
Joey Styles - Scott Carr is in HUMAN. But wait... that's where Lee Ryan was! He held on to the bottom of the ring the whole time! He must have somehow swung over, and the cameras didn't get it!
P. Lickin - But that means... Vox is trying to pin Scott Carr, and he's already eliminated, right?
Joey Styles - That's right! And Vox has no clue!
(The Vox pulls himself up to his feet as he turns around. Lee Ryan drops the chair on the floor, kicks The Vox to the midsection as he gets up, shocked at Lee Ryan standing there, and Lee Ryan hits the Double Impact on The Vox! Lee Ryan covers. The ref counts 1...2...3...
Joey Styles – It’s over! The Vox has done what nobody else has been able to do, defeat “Da Big Rig” Scott Carr and at the same time Lee Ryan defeats all of the odds, and literally holds on by the white of his knuckles to win the VWF Brazilian Death Match Sceptre at our eighth annual Birthday Bash! What a night it has been and I can’t wait until next year! )-)-)
(As soon as the carnage has been removed, "Think About The End" by Anthrax hits, and out comes VWF Owner, President, and Master, The Viking King, alone. The Viking King comes down to the ring with a mic and a chorus of boos. The Viking King has a black arm band on his left arm, and stands in the rings, not taunting the crowd. He begins to speak...)
THE VIKING KING: Two years ago we lost someone that was very special. Eddie Guerrero. This year, I continue his memory with this show. Our anniversary spectacular. The Big Birthday Bash is a show that would make Eddie proud I think, and that is one of the many reasons I will return, year after year, to do it. The VWF will be around long after I am gone completely, but this show... Will go on. It has been my utmost pleasure to bring tonight's show to you all, and I hope that you find it satisfactory. And now. Timekeeper... if you please... the ten bells...
(Triple B bows his head, and invites you to press play below. It is roughly 6 minutes long, and has been compressed down to under 5MB, so it can be viewed more easily. Thank you for your dedication to The VWF. Whether you have been with us for 8 days, 8 months, or 8 years. You are family, and always welcome in these doors, which God willing, will NEVER close...)
